If you’ve been practicing Ho‘oponopono and wondering why it’s not working for you, you’re not alone.
Many people repeat the sacred phrases I’m sorry, Please forgive me, Thank you, I love you but see little to no change. The truth? Ho‘oponopono works beautifully when you approach it the right way.
Over the years as a Law of Attraction coach, I’ve seen incredible transformations from this Hawaiian forgiveness practice. But I’ve also seen people unknowingly sabotage their results.
In this guide, we’ll cover the five most common Ho‘oponopono mistakes and how to fix them so you can unlock its full healing power.
1. Lacking Intention
Ho‘oponopono isn’t about mindlessly repeating words.
It’s about feeling them. The power comes from the emotion behind the phrases, not just the sounds themselves.
What to do instead:
Before you begin, bring to mind the situation, person, or memory you want to heal.
Feel genuine emotion such as compassion, forgiveness, and gratitude while reciting.
Slow down. Each phrase is an energetic offering, not a speed-reading contest.
Pro Tip: Imagine sending light or love directly to the situation as you say each phrase.
2. Practicing With Resistance
Some people chant Ho‘oponopono while holding fear, doubt, or skepticism inside. This creates energetic friction.
Why this matters:
If deep down you don’t believe the healing is possible, you block the process.
What to do instead:
Cultivate a mindset of trust.
Release the need to control the outcome.
Think of it like taking medicine from a trusted doctor. You don’t second-guess every swallow.
3. Trying to Control Others
Ho‘oponopono is not a manipulation tool.
If you use it to “make someone love you,” “change a boss’s mind,” or “force someone to behave,” you’re stepping out of alignment with its purpose.
Why this fails:
The practice works through self-cleansing and unconditional love, not coercion.
What to do instead:
Focus solely on your own energy and emotional clearing.
Allow others the freedom to evolve naturally.
Use Ho‘oponopono as an act of self-responsibility, not control.
4. Holding Onto Negative Emotions
You can’t be in a state of resentment, anger, or guilt and expect Ho‘oponopono to flourish.
Why this matters:
Negative emotions cloud the connection to the healing energy you’re trying to invoke.
What to do instead:
Notice your dominant emotional state throughout the day.
Practice shifting from negative to positive feelings quickly.
Even if negativity arises (you’re human!), aim for a daily “emotional average” that’s predominantly positive.
Quick Shift Tip: Smile while you practice. Your body posture and facial expression influence your emotional state.
5. Neglecting Personal Responsibility
Ho‘oponopono begins with I am 100% responsible.
If you constantly blame others such as your partner, your boss, or your family, you block the practice’s transformative power.
What to do instead:
Accept that everything in your experience is a reflection of your inner state.
Take ownership for your reactions, emotions, and interpretations.
Use the practice as a way to cleanse your energy field, knowing that external change follows internal change.
Bringing It All Together
When practiced with intention, trust, self-focus, positive emotion, and full responsibility, Ho‘oponopono becomes a life-changing tool.
Personally, I’ve seen it heal relationships, resolve financial blocks, and bring deep emotional peace not just for me, but for hundreds of people in my coaching community.
Next Step: Combine Ho‘oponopono with EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) tapping for a “double impact” on emotional clearing.
FAQs
Q: How long should I practice each day?
There’s no strict rule. Quality matters more than quantity. Even 5–10 minutes of deeply felt practice can be powerful.
Q: Can I use Ho‘oponopono for physical healing?
Yes, many people focus on the emotional and energetic roots of physical discomfort using this method.
Q: Do I need to believe in Hawaiian spirituality for it to work?
No. While it originates in Hawaiian tradition, the principles are universal: forgiveness, gratitude, and love.
Key Takeaways
Feel the phrases and don’t just recite them.
Release resistance and trust the process.
Focus on self-clearing, not controlling others.
Maintain a positive emotional state while practicing.
Accept full responsibility for your inner and outer reality.
If you found this guide helpful, share it with someone who’s been struggling with their Ho‘oponopono practice. The more people practice it correctly, the more healing we can bring into the world.
